Cookies & Crack

I went to Chapter's last night. By myself.  Without money.  That's like sending Charlie Sheen to a brothel without his penis or blow.  It was almost physically uncomfortable.  So many books.  Office supplies.  Fun sarcastic sticky notes and notebooks in and on which I could and would create.  Books books books.  Funny books.  Sad books.  Biographies.  Hair magazines.

And what did I buy?

Zip.  Zero.  Nada. Nothing.

I simply basked in the glow of the atmosphere and longed for a some Godiva chocolates and to live back in the city where I could go to Chapter's more than once every three months.  Oh and money.  I longed for money.  Money that would allow me to enter the store and buy whatever caught my fancy.

tee hee.  My fancy.  That's what I'm calling 'it' now.

Just kidding.  But seriously they have these new notebooks there now that are super cool.  I must have them and I will.  My birthday is at the end of the month and I've already decided I will be requesting a gift card.  I keep asking for one CD that I've yet to get so I'm going to give up on that and go the gift card route and get me some new notebooks.  I can also go into Staples and get just as excited about the stationary and office supplies there.

It's a sad strange addiction.

As is my addiction to cookies.  Which I baked this afternoon.  So that's awesome.  I have freshly baked oatmeal chocolate chip cookies in my house.  And milk.  So now I'm bloated.   Instead of "seven rocks" a day like our friend Charlie, I have approximately put away seven cookies and a glass of milk at this point.  So instead of having a hangover (or withdrawal-whatever Mr. Sheen's demon is), I am bloated and tired and working my way quickly to a Type 2 Diabetes diagnosis before I'm 40.

And it's Friday.  Friday night, right?  Good times.  Um, yeah, no.  Instead I'll likely watch recorded episodes of Grey's Anatomy or Harry's Law and Chelsea Lately.   Hopefully Shameless too.  I have wine.  And vodka, but I am so tired (long week + sugar crash) that having a drink doesn't even appeal to me at this point.  I want only to sleep.  And eat vast amounts of comfort food.  And buy a new notebook.

I don't think these are outlandish requests but, like Charlie Sheen, the planets are currently aligning against me.  He and I are simply and sadly misunderstood. 

Penny & Charlie
Charlie & Penny
Cookies & Crack
Crack & Cookies....it's all really just the same.

Well, except that Charlie could actually buy himself an actual Chapter's franchise and I can't even get a fucking notebook.  That just doesn't seem fair.

I need another cookie.

Happy New Year

Okay, so I'm not big on resolutions but given that 2010 sucked, a lot, in a variety of ways, I've decided to make 2011 better any way that I can.  And just how am I going to do this?  Well first of all, I'm going to get back to blogging on a daily basis! Starting today.  I know, I know, resolutions are supposed to start on the first but given it felt like a creature from a Stephen King novel had burrowed itself into my brain and I vomited like it was 1999 on the first?  I was in no shape to blog.  Then on the second I felt so good not being hungover that I tackled a number of household duties and prepared for my mother's visit the next day.

Which leads me to resolution number 2: quit procrastinating!!!

What I was preparing,on January 2nd, for my mother's visit, was her and her husband's gift.  Yes.  I'm aware that is late.  However I knew I wouldn't seen them until after Christmas so I left it.  Longer than I should have.  I leave everything longer than I should.  And then when I finish whatever it is I left, I feel so good.  You'd think I'd learn but much like hangovers, I'm not a real quick learner of the whole action and consequence thing.  Slow slow learner, in fact.

So there it is, blogging and no more procrastination.  Of course I have plans to return to the gym too.  Who doesn't?  Given that I was blessed with PMS during the yuletide season I'm sure my intestines are currently coated in chocolate and the Type 2 Diabetes fairy is chuckling with glee at my future of finger pricks (as opposed to the kind I'm used to dealing with, heh heh) and sugar spikes and drops.

As luck would have it though I purchased a lovely new pair of elastic waisted pants just prior to Christmas and they are divine.  I'm wearing them right now.  And just to the left of me is a small-ish pile of wrappers from some after dinner chocolates I was enjoying.  Again, reference the slow learner paragraph above.

So tomorrow it is off to book my son's birthday party, drop off some donations and tackle some work projects and laundry.  And with any luck at all?  No one in this house is on short supply of clean underwear because who am I kidding?!

Happy New Year!