So yes, Mother's Day was yesterday. I am a mother and I even have a mother. Did I celebrate? Kind of.
My day began before 6:30 a.m. My 7 year old came in our room and just stood there. I knew he was there but hoped that if I didn't acknowledge I could sleep until 6:30 when my alarm was set to go off. Then I felt guilty (because I am a mother) and opened my eyes. He quickly replied: "Mom, you can stay sleeping, I need Dad." So I shut my eyes again and shortly after Ryan (husband) followed Reese downstairs.
I pretended to sleep until they (Ryan, Reese, and our youngest, Rhett-don't judge all the R names-at least they're all real names) came back and presented me with a lovely breakfast of scrambled eggs and toast with homemade jam (courtesy of Reese, the aforementioned 7 year old)! It was very sweet (the gesture and the jam!). I was quite pleased and then set about my day.
My day of luxury and pampering involved being at Motorcross-just for point of reference is it "Motocross" or "Motorcross"? Anyway, I needed to be at the track, with my 14 year old daughter, by 7:30 a.m. We were 'flaggers' for a day of racing. This, for those of you unfamiliar, meant we were stationed at different points on the track with two flags. One yellow, cautionary one, and one red and white "Hey, someone might be dead over here" flag.
It was a miserable day weather-wise. I started shaking uncontrollably sometime around 11 a.m. I was wearing, for the record, jeans, a t-shirt, a heavy sweater and a denim jacket, socks and shows. And a hat. I kept my hat up with the hood over stop. I was fucking freezing. My daughter, who does not have any of her mother's age defying weight (don't get this? go back a few posts and frankly, I'm insulted that you aren't familiar with my extensive library of works), nearly froze to death. She was not wearing a jacket. I offered mine but she didn't want it.
To really set the stage, imagine the prairie. Wet, cold, flat prairie. Except this Prairie has been altered to resemble a race track complete with jumps. With boys and grown men on dirt bikes-racing one another and going as fast as they can. Then imagine you are perched atop a little hump of dirt beside a jump. A jump that the riders like to take on the outside. This brings them within mere feet (sometimes inches, I swear) of me. Now who's feeling like an extra special mommy?
By the end of the day, which for the record, occurred at 6 p.m., we were both wind burnt and frozen and I could no longer see. And we were frozen despite the fact my husband brought us extra layers and a sleeping bag for my daughter and her friend.
I also couldn't see. Something to do with gale force winds, dust and cold having a nasty effect on my contacts.
Probably not one of my favourite Mother's Days ever. On the bright side, this fundraiser was for a trip to Europe next April and this time I get to go along! When my son went, I didn't. This time, Mama is going along.
I came home to clutter, cat vomit and spaghetti for supper. I enjoyed the spaghetti. The clutter and vomit, not so much. My oldest son treated me to a Blizzard Cake from Dairy Queen, also enjoyable.
The day had it's ups and downs which I guess is fitting. I am sensitive but not sentimental. I will spend upwards of 45 minutes looking for a greeting card that expresses itself without oozing sap. So this is what I have to say about Mother's Day and Motherhood in general:
1. It is Hard.
2. Most of the time, it is worth it.
3. Nothing will make you feel guiltier and/or prouder, sometimes all at the same time.
4. I don't know what my life would be without children. I can't imagine it and I think its because it never would've been or was really an option for me. Forget that I started at not quite 17; even if I had not chosen to explore the wonders and challenges of teen pregnancy and motherhood (without a fucking reality show-don't even get me started on that! I refuse to watch it nor would I let my children, not that they've asked; that show is poison)...wow,
okay I got off track. My point is, I knew motherhood was going to be a part of my life.
5. I like my kids. Even the one that doesn't like me much right now. Some of you might assume or feel it's obvious-as in, of course I like them, they're mine. No, all that means is I love them and would literally kill for them. Liking them is a whole other ball game, and I do like mine.
6. Now that I am parent to a teenage girl I feel I may have been a tad harsh toward my own mother at that age, but that's purely speculation...
Happy Mother's Day friends! Hope you were warmed than I and that you too, like your kids, if you have them. If you don't have any, I'm a tad jealous that you likely slept in and then spent the day doing whatever you wanted. On the flip side of that, I bet no one made you strawberry jam or bought you a Blizzard Cake...I'm just sayin'.
*Disclaimer-in no way do I mean to suggest I am superior to anyone who chooses not have to have children for whatever reason. I despise those who think a woman is less than should she choose not to have another being inhabit her body for nine months, then present itself via her vagina and from there, inhabit the rest of her life. It's a personal choice and I applaud those who chose what's best for them, whatever that may be.